I've been trying to quit smoking. It's just not what I envisioned Id ever do. I was a health nut until I went back to grad school in my forties and got remarried to a smoker. The combination of stress and influence and availability in the home caused my downfall. It's very rare that a nonsmoker becomes a smoker in later life. My identity was formed in such a way as to not identify with such a self destructive practice. Yet here I am. In therapy now, trying to sort out and hopefully lift the previous grad school PTSD, as I'm about to start another graduate degree in August. But here's where your piece comes in.
The concept of sustainability is ringing in my ears. Previous attempts at quitting with every aid or program under the sun havent work for me and I think it's because I am a word person and a concept person. I needed a concept stronger than whatever internalized anxiety has taken root inside me since my divorce in my forties and attempt to remake my life at midlife from housewife to person who could sustain myself financially. I remember feeling like a deer in the headlights.
When I decided to work for myself it was the opposite of what I thought my reentry plan was going to be. And we know what starting a business is like. It's such a leap when one is a single mom with responsibilities. I think, in this moment, the deer just stayed in the headlights for years. Now I make my living and I am doing well. But it was a journey which required a continual daily leap of faith. Everything was about courage, all the time. And I was white knuckling it through much of the past decade, as I built something sustainable that is now growing every year in a nice consistent way finally.
But it isn't really sustainable, is it, if I'm jeapardizing my health. When you mentioned wanting to be around in 15 or 30 years, that was an unraveling my soul needed and a meaning-making my mind needed. And you kept mentioning sustainability through the entire sharing, until the word just broke through my subconscious content. This was logo therapy for me today...and I thank you.
I am glad that you figured out a way to make a more authentic living! And, indeed it is truly a success if it can support you wholly, including your health.
I love your constant and consistent honesty, George. You certainly do share from the heart. And when you share from your own experience, you always make me feel better about myself. Thank you! 🙏💕
This was very helpful, George. I started writing a blog during the pandemic, just because I needed to do something. I wrote about the books I was reading and hash tagged it #amreading. I had 2 followers, my brother and my son. Showing up in public on my blog helped me believe that I have something to share. Now that I'm posting specific content on Substack about the history of abolitionists, your suggestion to make mistakes while your audience is small, combined with recycling content gave me the idea to use my inactive blog to brainstorm on a local/neighborhood history that some people are very interested in. I'm looking forward to lightly connecting with my ideal audience.
I've been trying to quit smoking. It's just not what I envisioned Id ever do. I was a health nut until I went back to grad school in my forties and got remarried to a smoker. The combination of stress and influence and availability in the home caused my downfall. It's very rare that a nonsmoker becomes a smoker in later life. My identity was formed in such a way as to not identify with such a self destructive practice. Yet here I am. In therapy now, trying to sort out and hopefully lift the previous grad school PTSD, as I'm about to start another graduate degree in August. But here's where your piece comes in.
The concept of sustainability is ringing in my ears. Previous attempts at quitting with every aid or program under the sun havent work for me and I think it's because I am a word person and a concept person. I needed a concept stronger than whatever internalized anxiety has taken root inside me since my divorce in my forties and attempt to remake my life at midlife from housewife to person who could sustain myself financially. I remember feeling like a deer in the headlights.
When I decided to work for myself it was the opposite of what I thought my reentry plan was going to be. And we know what starting a business is like. It's such a leap when one is a single mom with responsibilities. I think, in this moment, the deer just stayed in the headlights for years. Now I make my living and I am doing well. But it was a journey which required a continual daily leap of faith. Everything was about courage, all the time. And I was white knuckling it through much of the past decade, as I built something sustainable that is now growing every year in a nice consistent way finally.
But it isn't really sustainable, is it, if I'm jeapardizing my health. When you mentioned wanting to be around in 15 or 30 years, that was an unraveling my soul needed and a meaning-making my mind needed. And you kept mentioning sustainability through the entire sharing, until the word just broke through my subconscious content. This was logo therapy for me today...and I thank you.
I am glad that you figured out a way to make a more authentic living! And, indeed it is truly a success if it can support you wholly, including your health.
I love your constant and consistent honesty, George. You certainly do share from the heart. And when you share from your own experience, you always make me feel better about myself. Thank you! 🙏💕
I so appreciate your comment Claire! 🙏🏼💛
This was very helpful, George. I started writing a blog during the pandemic, just because I needed to do something. I wrote about the books I was reading and hash tagged it #amreading. I had 2 followers, my brother and my son. Showing up in public on my blog helped me believe that I have something to share. Now that I'm posting specific content on Substack about the history of abolitionists, your suggestion to make mistakes while your audience is small, combined with recycling content gave me the idea to use my inactive blog to brainstorm on a local/neighborhood history that some people are very interested in. I'm looking forward to lightly connecting with my ideal audience.
I'm so glad this was helpful, Rose! Great to see you continuing to write and experiment 🙌🏾